Ames

wow

2005-11-19T15:27:00.000+11:00

Hey everyone,
well it has been FOREVER since i last wrote... I guess a lot has happened and yet nothing comes to mind. Well only 2 days left of school! Isnt that sooooo sad! We have normal classes for monday and tuesday, then final assembly. Then exams (but we dont have to go to school if we dont have exams - and i have great classes so i dont have many exams) then not this the ver next wednesday we have formal!! I cant believe how fast this year has gone... I hate the idea of leaving my school cause everyone there is so totally awesome! I love you guys! And i will miss you all sooooo much!!
umm so what has happened... well i have just been keeping myself busy :) i spent last week watching drama productions GO THE CONCRETE SONG! Jess, Mitch, Sarah S, Laur's and everyone else YOU ROCKED!!
Well mum is doing ok, i mean under the circumstances... She had another lot of chemo on friday, so she is sleeping alot! We both started crying today... its amazing that the hurt you feel just keeps going strong! But we will work together and we will all get through it!!
I talked to Mr Coman about everything that has happened and he was so supportive! I am really glad i got the opportunity to talk to him.
Anyway im gonna bounce, but i will definately write again...
Love you allz
special all my trinity galz... haha and Joe lol
Love Amy

sorry

2005-10-29T23:10:00.000+10:00

Well im pretty sure no-one really reads this anyway but in case im highly mistaken, im sorry that its been so long since i last wrote. Lots has happened and when i explain it all, im sure you will understand why its been so long.
See mum is in hospital. Mums cancer has gone to her liver and they cant get rid of it. The average person in her condition lives around 13 months! Im dying for her to live longer cause im not ready to lose her!!!!!!! She had her first lot of chemo on friday and they said she will probably be allowed home on tuesday next week.
We also found out why mum was vomiting so much this last month or so, it is because the cancer causes hormones in the body that tells the brain there isnt enough calcium in the body when there is. So the body makes lots of extra calcium and it has caused her vomiting!!
Mum is hell sick at the moment and its scaring the hell outta me cause i just cant deal with it. I feel so alone and i dont know what i will do when something happens to my mum. I need her more than you guys can ever imagine! Dood im only 15, no-one is meant to lose their mum or dad at this age. I know it happens all the time but it doesnt make it any less painful.
My aunt has been here this past week or so. She came up on tuesday and is leaving tomorrow arvo. She has basically helped out around the house and driven me to and from the hospital lots. It has been a pretty miserable holiday for her but she says she has just enjoyed being with us and all that. She is remarkable. And handles everything so well! LOVE YOU AUNTIE MARY!!!
Anyway i cant be stuffed to write more.
But il be back one when i have more time
Love ALways
Amy

Lift

2005-10-18T20:19:00.000+10:00

After re-reading over my last post i decided to post the lyrics to Shannon Noll - Lift

I know you're hurting
Feels like you're learning
'Bout life the hard way
And it aint working
Seems like forever
that you've been falling
its time to move on
your life is calling, yeah.

This was never meant to be the end
close the book and start again

Chorus:
Cos i know how hard it can get
But you've gotta lift
You've gotta lift
And sometimes that's how it is
But i know you're stronger
stronger than this
You've gotta lift
you've gotta lift

When you can feel your
whole body's aching
What's left of your heart
it wont stop breaking
You've got to let go
you took a hit
time to pick up now
move on from this

This was never meant to be the end
close the book and start again

Chorus

You've got to lift yourself above all the hurt
dont give in
whipe your eyes and remember you're better than this
let them know that they took their best shot and they missed
come on and lift

Chorus

Pick up now...
Pick up now

more bad news

2005-10-18T20:13:00.000+10:00

Well guys,
Today brought more bad news about my mum. We found out that the cancer has probably spread into her liver, and they wont be able to get it all out. There is treatment mum can have that will stop it growing as fast! But i think it shook us all up a bit.
Anyway today was o.k other than that. I had school and it was good to be with my friends again. I love them all so much and they have all been so encouraging. Jess has been great and i dunno how i woulda got through these last few days without her!!! I LOVE YOU JESS!!!!! Everyone else has been wonderful too!
I got Shannon Nolls new album today. I love it so much. His music is just so special and his song lift made me cry!!!!
I have youth group this friday which im really looking forward too as well. Sarah has been really encouraging to me as well, and im looking forward to seeing her on friday and chatting to her (hopefully she wont be too busy to talk to me)
Anyway im sorry this is short, but i dont know what else to write so i might go
Love Always
Amy

Whats going on

2005-10-17T20:37:00.000+10:00

Hey,
Well sorry its been a few days since i last wrote. I have just been doing stuff. Well today was actually pretty good. During school i went to a nursing home for my practical christian life studies class and that was really fun, the old people taught me and my friends how to play shuffleboard which was kinda cool and then we got to hang out talking to the old folk. I met a woman who turned 101 this saturday thats just been. Very cool. And then we got to walk over to the shops and buy lunch there and we then walked back to school it was just me, aleisha, kerrie, mitch, sophia, and monica. None of us knew how to get back cause mr coman (the teacher) didnt explain how to get back, and we got a little lost but got back in the end. And then there was this big thing with the cops arresting this guy just outside our school. The two cops like crash tackled him to the ground! Very exciting. And then i came home and that was ok as well. Mum started crying today, and i just had to hold her as she cried heaps, that was really hard to deal with and made me cry a bit as well, but other than that the day was ok. Oh except for in math, my math teacher has just got married and she was saying how her husbands late wife died of breast cancer (that was hard cause of everything that is happening with mum and i started to tear up, but no-one noticed thank heavens) Anyway it was pretty ok.

Mums surgery is on thursday. I will be happy when its over and done with. And then my auntie is flying up from tassie to come and visit.it should be good to be with my family, but im not as excited as i normally would be. I dunno maybe its just that with everything going on im just not getting excited about things. I am also getting my Learners License soon. 2nd of November. That is pretty cool as well. But im kinda nervous of actually driving! Ahahaha and i dont wanna get my picture taken to have on my card but oh well!

Anyway thats all for now
Love Always
Amy

Sick

2005-10-16T14:06:00.000+10:00

Well, my mum is really sick at the moment. She is throwing up! Her surgery is on thursday and then she needs radiotherapy... I am really scared cause i know how bad it was the last time she had cancer! I seem to randomly burst into tears over stupid things. And when my mate fiona came over i was in a really bad mood the whole time. I felt aweful but i just didnt seem to be able to stop it! I didnt want her to see me cry cause i hate the idea of her thinking im not coping! I know everyone wants to support me and i really appreciate it, its just so hard! To be honest im petrified, and i dont know how im gonna be able to cope!
Love Amy

my beautiful mother

2005-10-13T17:09:00.000+10:00

Mum got her tests back today, and it isnt such good news. My mum has cancer again. I dont know what is going to be happening yet, but im scared! Anyway i dont know what to say! I will write again later
Love Amy

Beginnings

2005-10-13T10:43:00.000+10:00

Hey everyone,
Well this is my first time at blogging on here and its kind of exciting really! Im really doing this because im too slack to keep a diary and this is another way of doing it. Anyway i dont know what else to write at the moment but i will write again soon!
Love Always
Ames

Who I am

2005-10-12T18:37:00.000+10:00

Well i know it was just a few mins ago that i last posted but i thought i would come on here and basically tell you all a bit about me. My name is Amy and im 15.

I love music, and its basically the thing that keeps me sane. I love Jimmy eat world, good charlotte, simple plan, HIM, three days grace, the used, and i LOVE shannon noll! I also like lots of other music but i cant think of what else off the top of my head.

I am currently in year 10 and almost finished. I only have 6 or 7 weeks left and then i am in year 11. In college im going to be doing photography, psychology, sociology, english and math. These subjects are pretty good for me because i want to be a psychologist when i grow up. I am moving school for year 11 and 12 and i am really a bit nervous, and i dont wanna leave my friends!
I like reading. And i enjoy writing as well (even though i really suck at it) But my biggest hobby is hanging with friends! My friends mean the world to me and i dont know what i would do without them.

I also really like animals, i have two dogs named Ellie who is a minature long haired daschund and Bonnie who is a border Collie. I also have a cat named Jess. Plus a whole heap of budgies and some fish.

Anyway that is just a little about me, but im sure i will tell you more over time.
Lots of Love
Ames